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Chapter 4

The Hand That Grasps

Abruptly, a hand ghosted over my wrist, yanking me from the depths of slumber. A strangled cry of alarm clawed its way up my throat, silenced almost instantly by a swift hand clamping over my mouth. My eyes flew open to see Vanity looming above me, her features twisted into a mask of grim determination. Her grip softened and she slid onto my bed, her voice barely a murmur in the hushed silence. “We have to get out now,” she said, the severity of her gaze forcing me to sit up straight.

Blinking away the sleep, I let the chill metal blanket slide off me. “What, why?” I asked, the sharp tang of panic flavoring my words.

“I’ll explain as we go.” Her words cut off as I noticed she had tossed a change of clothes onto my lap. They were not my usual attire, but rugged and resilient, reminiscent of a military uniform. “Put these on fast.”

My mind was a swirl of confusion as I threaded my legs into my pants. “Did something happen?” The words tasted bitter on my tongue.

Vanity, her back stiff, moved to the door, her gaze flitting between the slit in the door and me. “I don’t know, Prina,” she said, her voice just a notch above a whisper. “I know one thing, though. We need to get you out of here.” She cast one more glance out the door before returning her attention to me. “I owe you this, Prina. I owe you this.”

“I don’t understand. What is going on?” I asked, the frantic rhythm of my heart beating a counterpoint to my words.

Satisfied that I was dressed, Vanity walked over and hauled me to my feet, her grip strong and unyielding. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”

The words caught me off guard, my breath hitching in my chest. She steered me down the hallway, the dimness pressing in on us. The once familiar environment seemed to have morphed into a skeletal remains of its former self, an eerie specter of decay and abandonment. Vanity kept pace as she dragged me up the stairs, a silent sentinel guiding me towards the medical bays. “You said you would explain,” I murmured, my voice barely audible in the vast silence.

With a shrug, she finally spoke, “I don’t expect you to understand much of this. There is, however, an entity known as Azergile. It has enslaved the entire world. You need to find Azergile and kill it.”

I could barely suppress the incredulous gasp that escaped my lips. “What?!”

Her expression hardened, but her eyes held a flicker of hope. “There’s a disease in your blood. It has the potential to deactivate it. It’s just a matter of getting to it and deactivating it.” She locked eyes with me, her gaze searching. “Do you understand?” Her words echoed in the quiet room, leaving me grappling with the enormity of the task. Could this be the imposter Hellibor warned me about? Is this the Vanity I knew, or is it something else altogether? “We need to get you out of here. There is no way out through the normal exit, so we need to use the subterranean gate. But before we can begin, I need to do something. Trust me, Prina. Prina, you trust me, right?” She posed the question gently, but her eyes were serious as they bore into mine.

Nodding, I murmured my agreement. “I trust you.” The words tasted bittersweet, like a half-remembered promise. As I met Vanity’s gaze, I could see tears pooling in her eyes. Her gaze drifted away as she stepped into the room, and although uncertainty gnawed at me, I followed. I felt a sudden sense of entrapment, an inevitability closing in.

“Get on the couch.” Vanity instructed, the examination table gleaming ominously under the harsh overhead light. As I climbed onto the frigid metal, Vanity opened a cabinet overhead, revealing an array of medical tools. “Doctor Winters knows the colony will soon shut down. He would rather trap you here. His selfish desire is to keep you a secret.” She paused, pulling out a vial of clear liquid and a metal ring. “We can’t let that happen, Prina. There is a way to make this nightmare end!” Her voice was a crescendo of desperation, her fingers trembling as she held the items. “I am sorry.” She laid the metal ring next to me, her hands steady now. “It’s the only way I can think of making it work,” she said, her voice choked.

My eyes were drawn to the object she held. The metal circle was ominous, its unknown purpose chilling. “I don’t understand.” I managed to whisper, my voice a frail thread in the tense silence.

“I know, honey. I know.” She uncapped the vial and poured the liquid onto a rag, her movements brisk. “Prina, unbutton your shirt and give me your left arm.”

Numbly, I complied, the metallic snap of each button echoing ominously in the room. As I tugged the garment over my head, a pang of fear struck me, the fabric blinding my view. Suddenly exposed, I could feel Vanity’s gaze on me. “You’re scaring me, Vanity.”

Her expression was heartbreakingly solemn as she looked at me, her eyes filled with unshed tears. Then, with a sudden burst of movement, she pressed the rag to my mouth. I thrashed against the sudden onslaught, a surge of adrenaline igniting my fight response. Her fingers dug into my cheeks, her grip unyielding.

“I’m so sorry it has to be this way! It’ll be alright. I promise it’ll be fine. I’m sorry. Please forgive me.” Vanity’s voice was a flurry of frantic reassurances. An eerily familiar scene was playing out. The beach. This had happened before…

A drowsiness started to creep in, the sedative infiltrating my system with a heavy, cloying sweetness. As I went limp, Vanity cradled me, her arms soft and comforting against the chilling reality. She gently eased me onto the table. “Why?” I mumbled, my words slurred with the onset of unconsciousness.

“I am so sorry.” The words tumbled from her lips like fragile glass, barely audible over the heavy silence. Without a moment’s hesitation, Vanity slid the metallic ring up my left arm. A sharp hiss filled the room, immediately followed by a pain so visceral, so gut-wrenching, that it threatened to fracture my very soul.

My eyes widened in unspeakable horror as I realized the horrific reality: the ring wasn’t simply tight – it was cutting through flesh and bone. Blood began to flood the sterile metal table beneath me, painting the cold steel a gruesome red, the metallic scent saturating the air. Through a haze of torment, Vanity’s face appeared above me, tears streaming unchecked down her face, reflecting the torment mirrored in my own eyes.

My mouth opened, the scream trapped within wanting to tear free, but only silence echoed back. The room started to spin, my vision darkening, as the unthinkable reality pressed in: my left arm was no longer a part of me. Everything around me blurred, the edges fraying as the frosty fingers of unconsciousness reached out and pulled me into its icy embrace.

The cold made me feel like I was freezing. Upon waking, my left arm was throbbing with burning pain. As I lift my limp body up, I place the injured limb in my arms. The room seemed as if it was enveloped in gray and nothing else could be seen. My mouth snapped open as a long dreadful cry lashed my lungs. My eyes are drawn to the circle around the arm as I let go of my limb. My eyes caught sight of it at that moment. The color of my skin on one side of the ring was different from the color on the other. Faced with a hand that wasn’t mine, I raised the limb to my face in shock. There were long, painted, crimson fingernails, and the hand was mature, but not the one I knew. This hand, this hand was different.

“A mighty peculiar exchange, to be honest.” I glance at Helibore, perched across from me on a chair, with both legs crossed over each other. He gripped his mouth with one hand while his other lay lazily nearby. A physician’s coat adorned his body, which was nothing special.  On the other hand, the extensive slash of blood on his jacket was a concern.

It wasn’t easy to summon the courage to ask him, “What happened?”

Having uncrossed his legs, he sat up straight. “Well, I suppose you deserve an explanation about what’s been going on.” The doctor got up and casually approached me. As he inspected the arm I was offered, his hand rested on my shoulder. Blue glazed eyes swept over me; I sensed their soft intent. By slipping his hand into his pocket, he retrieved the needle gun. “For the last time, I will draw blood from you, Primina.” It was at that moment that I understood him. The blood. All of this is because of my blood. He needs it for something. “Do I have your permission?”

What more could I have said? “Yeah,” I replied. “Go ahead.” Again, the familiar sting fell over my arm as Helibore stuck me with the needle. There was almost a feeling of it sucking the blood out of my veins, sucking out my precious rubies. Like the arteries of the world, and like the gold that men mine from dangerous vaults. In other words, that was my blood. “So, are you finally willing to explain things to me? Vanity tried to tell me, but she wasn’t making sense.”

“She panicked. I told her the truth of the situation earlier.” Hellibor admitted, biting his lower lip after. This piece of information wasn’t something he was looking forward to. “She left. She ran away. It’s just you and me now.”

Suddenly I became disoriented, swinging my feet off the table and kicking imaginary ghosts away. “So,” I replied. A moment of silence passes between the two of us. “What did she do to me?”
Doctor Winters took a step away from me. “I ah,” he replied after a long pause while contemplating what to say. “That arm. I could tell you recognized it. It turns my stomach.”

It isn’t. That could not possibly be. “What do you mean?”

“It’s her arm. As I raised my arm again, I heard him say, “She gave you her arm.” As I stared at it, I began to cry. It, it could not be. My admission would come from the paint on my nails, no matter what. So let me explain. You are suffering from a disease, as you know. In the wake of the emergence of nanomachines, we started using them to treat illnesses. The structure of your disease, however, is strange. By deactivating nanomachines, it prevents their operation. Due to the fact that drugs cannot treat the underlying cause of your disease, treatment is impossible. This will ultimately lead to your death. You carry the disease within your blood.” He explained, securing my attention. “Primina I am over five hundred years old. The entire colony is over four hundred years old. As for you, well, you have existed in stasis for longer than any of us know.”

My mouth opens slightly and I let out a slight gasp. This was beyond my comprehension. Clearly, this is a lie. There is no doubt about it. When I heard that I further inquired, “How is that possible?”

“We perfected machines in order to maintain our existence. Our blemishes would be repaired. In other words, we are trapped in our own bodies.” Immortality. In our minds, we thought we were so clever. Our battle against death was successful. Our foolishness was so obvious. It would take us years to discover that nano machines would restructure our bodies and minds if we suffered anything even slightly dangerous. In the case of a scratch, our bodies would be twisted and distorted. Consequently, it would lead to insanity by disrupting our neural networks. We did not overcome our mental struggles with insanity, though. That would have been too kind. Pain is the first sensation we experience. All the twists and turns of our organs and everything that made us. But blemishes and changes lead to that. In general, as long as we maintained our human form, we were okay.”

“So what do I have to do with this?” I asked, dreading the answer.

Hellibor removes the needle from my arm and smiles at me, “You are the transmigration of our original sin. Originally, we could die. We played god… and we lost. Our godchild, however, deemed us unworthy. The paradise we once had in perfect bodies turned out to be our eternal cage in hell.”

When Hellibor inserted the needle into his arm, he grinned as the blood drained into him. “What are you doing!” I yell at him. I tried to wrestle the gun, but alas I was not strong enough. A snap of his arm sent me plunging into another bed.

“Sacred blood, untainted by the soul of man’s iniquities. It is through you that we cross over to the afterlife. That veritable paradise of eternal slumber that was stolen from us. Through you, the world shall die and be given everlasting peace, whatever that may be. At least I will have peace.” My only choice was to watch Hellibor fail. I stared up at him with tears streaming down my cheeks. “It has finally arrived. My angel of death, Primina. You are not suited for suffering. My heart longs for a different outcome. It would have been better if you had stayed in bed. Nevertheless, I was convinced.  My emotions overrode my logic.”

Jumping to my feet, I embraced him with a hug, and he folded his arms around me. “Hellibor, please do not abandon me.” I pleaded with him.

It’s okay. As he reached for a surgical knife, he said, “You need not fear.” I felt my stomach sink as I observed his hands clasping around the blade. I wanted that moment to last. Embraced in the warmth of his caring arms. I truly did.

In a split second, I shoved him onto a bed. Out of my mouth like fire, “Get away from me!” I shouted.

Hellibor twisted back towards me with his knife in hand and declared, “Allow me to clip your wings to give you this precious gift of death you have given me.” I kept watching him as he walked toward me like a mad man. “You don’t comprehend how bad it has become. You would be better off dying now and never knowing what happened to the world. Please don’t mistake me Primina. As an act of love, this is what I am doing. Vanity begged me to release you to the world. Apparently, she believes you can deactivate the central computer. The hell you’d have to endure is unimaginable. You would die an awful death, if not worse. Please don’t resist.”

With a shake of my head, I said, “You’re insane.”

“I can feel the blood pumping through my body. It burns, and it feels so good to know. Just knowing your blood is killing these horrible machines; it will pump through my body soon, and I will be able to leave this wretched world. Don’t be afraid, Primina. I will make sure it does not hurt for long.” He stepped toward me.

In an impressive display of strength, I thrust the metal table covered in medical tools at him. Hellibor lifts his arm to shield himself from the sharp objects and diverse metal parts that fly into the air. In an effort to take advantage of this opportunity, I swiftly leave the room through the hall. “You can’t run Primina. Everything is shutting down.” He screeched out the door.

There were flickers and flashes of light in the building as they coughed up their last packets of power. When I glanced at Vanity’s arm, I wondered why she would do such a thing. My eyes widened as I realized what she wanted. The black door was her request for me to leave. She wanted me to go through it.  

My gaze remained unbroken, riveted to the ascension of a stairwell – a pathway to my emancipation. I yearned to escape the clutches of this monstrous institution, to break free from this hellish torment, and the insanity it harbored. With resolve, I approached the formidable black door, its imposing presence looming over me as I scaled the steps. Reaching the apex, my own reflection assaulted me from the polished surface. A ghost of my former self stared back – my clothing torn, body marred and stained with blood. The visage was horrendous, a grim tableau. An unnerving sensation of self-estrangement washed over me as if the person mirrored in front of me was a stranger. Gingerly, my left hand grazed the icy slate. It parted into dual slabs, yielding me entry but snatching a souvenir – a bloody handprint.

“Why?” The question fell from my lips, a sorrowful whisper consumed by quiet sobs. The realization of my circumstances hit with crushing weight. My vision was ensnared by an eerie spectacle – enormous vats filled with human forms suspended in a shadowy purgatory. Each one of them was unique, representing various stages of development, some youthful, others more mature, but all shared a characteristic: jet-black hair and femininity. The grisly scene continued at the room’s rear, where lasers zapped body parts suspended from meat hooks, which, in a grotesque parody of nature, regenerated at an alarming speed. I was trapped in this slaughterhouse of nightmares, surrounded by walls adorned with twitching organs that pulsated with a macabre life of their own.

“Adrenochrome.” The word sliced through the haunting silence, and I whirled around. Hellibor stood behind me, but the man before me was a grotesque caricature of the doctor I once knew. His face was a disintegrating mask of anguish teetering on the brink of total collapse. “All this, made from you. We cloned you, time and again, but failed. Your blood was never the same, forcing us to wake you, to use you. Do you realize, Primina, you’re older than I am? Let me grant you the gift of oblivion.”

His primal roar echoed throughout the chamber as he lunged, his attack powerfully wild. I narrowly evaded the bone saw he wielded like a madman, dismembering organs that gushed a viscous brown fluid. I retreated, my back kissed by the cool glass of a vat. Undeterred, he charged again, his skin shedding with each frantic stride. A quick sidestep brought me around the vat, Hellibor crashing into it in my stead. The glass shattered, submerging him in a tide of chemicals. My doppelganger, a clone suspended in the vat, met its end gasping its final breath. “Primina, don’t run! It’s a game!” Doctor Winters’ desperate pleas echoed, his sanity crumbling. The Hellibor I knew wouldn’t stoop to such insanity.

Caught in the maw of madness, the instinct to flee overpowered me. I weaved my way through countless experiments, venturing deeper into the labyrinthine complex. Slipping past another set of double gates, I found myself in an unspeakable horror. The hall was infested with cancerous growths; walls pulsated with monstrous muscle tissue. Hellibor’s voice trailed after me, a warning etched in desperation, “Primina, don’t go in there. You won’t survive.”

Ignoring his plea, I sprinted through the grotesque foyer. Fate, however, has a grim sense of humor. The exit was rusted shut, marred with unknown fluids. I beat against it, demanding, “Open!”

Panic spurred me into action, frantically searching for a release switch. My hand hit a hydraulic lever and the doors groaned, reluctantly parting. A glance over my shoulder revealed my pursuer, Hellibor limping after me. The gate opened sluggishly, agonizingly slow. I pushed against it in desperation, my heart pounding in sync with my shouts. Hellibor looked more monster than man, his skin covered in grotesque boils, his face unrecognizable. “Primina. Don’t fear. Just surrender and die, die, die!” he croaked, inching closer.

“Stay away!” My back pressed against the partially opened door as I screamed in defiance. Suddenly, a bone protruded from his leg, snapping with a sickening crunch. He collapsed, his body fragmenting upon impact, painting the floor red. Repulsed, I turned away from the horrifying scene.

By the time the portal was fully accessible, a horror beyond my wildest nightmares commenced. The amorphous mass of flesh began to animate, sprouting limbs of sorts – an unsettling ambiguity between arms and legs. I darted through the gate, confronted by walls burgeoning with muscular tendrils. Risking a glance over my shoulder, I saw the disquieting entity in pursuit, squirming relentlessly. The viscous tissue thickened as I descended further into the nightmarish spectacle, confining me to my stomach, forced to crawl in the gut of this beastly corridor. Despite this monstrous impediment, Hellibor relentlessly stalked me, advancing on mangled stubs that were once legs.

As I squirmed through the undulating flesh, it thrummed with life, contorting and convulsing around me, compressing my body in a ghastly embrace. Turning my head was a Herculean feat; I felt like a maggot worming through a cadaver. A skeletal hand clamped onto my ankle, Hellibor’s grip icy in contrast to the warm, pulsing flesh. I howled in pain, my screams swallowed by the meaty walls. Hellibor’s senseless ramblings echoed around me, “Riaoh riah gowah!”, an auditory testament to a deteriorating mind. I surged forward with renewed vigor, each movement causing the fleshy walls to react, muscles rippling in another wave of spasms. Although blinded by the dense tissue, I kicked out blindly, my fear lending me strength. Even as the walls of flesh convulsed around me, threatening to crush me, I propelled myself forward, fueled by desperation and survival instinct.

Emerging from the gruesome passageway, I hastily brushed off the residual blood smeared on my clothing and slumped against the quivering wall. Raising my eyes, I was met with the sky – a canvas of gleaming lavender. My view was dominated by the remnants of what used to be my sanctuary. As far as my eyes could see, the once-familiar landscape was now a desolate ruin. I sat amidst the sparse rocks, my back against the sprawling, pulsating wall that encapsulated my desecrated home – a home that now lay lifeless and corrupted.

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